Parents bought a pack of batteries for my niece and nephews’ gifts. Took a couple for my vibrator. Happy holidays. PGP.

Computer broke at work and I did absolutely nothing productive all day. I’ve never been more happy. God bless us, every one. PGP.

Wednesday, you son of a bitch. PGP.

Got my NYE party invitation. It’s in my company’s warehouse. It’s not a party. It’s inventory and it goes on until 10 p.m. Happy fucking New Year. PGP.

My New Year’s resolution is the same as it was sophomore year in college: To stop pissing myself while blacked out. PGP.

Monday, you son of a bitch. PGP.

Work being an excuse to get away from my family during the holidays. PGP.

Cousin Eddie being unemployed for seven years because he’s holding out for a management position. PGP.

The highlight of my week was setting up my auto reply email for Christmas vacation. PGP.