People you don’t know endorsing you for skills you don’t have on LinkedIn. PGP.

Last night, I had a dream I bought a Maserati. The entire dream I worried about my credit, car payments, and repair costs. I woke up in a cold sweat. PGP.

Just overheard my boss say, “I can still do a keg stand.” PGP.

Too old to have roommates. Too poor to live alone. PGP.

I purposely print from the printer across the office to have an excuse to leave my desk. PGP.

Wednesday: Finally feel recovered from the weekend. Thursday: Happy hour. PGP.

Blowing your weekly budget on a deductible at the pharmacy. PGP.

The doctor recommending a prostate exam during your annual physical. PGP.

I just paused to remember if the word was “dissatisfied” or “unsatisfied.” It took me a second because I’ve never needed to know that until this point in my life. PGP.

I wish my mom still packed my lunch. PGP.