The intern is more productive than I am. PGP.

The person that talks to me the most during the day is the voice in the elevator. PGP.

I just lost all respect for my coworker because she doesn’t like Chipotle. PGP.

Feeling better about “Nice work” coming from PGP than your own boss. PGP.

People thinking you’re telling a joke when you tell them your salary. PGP.

Getting your biggest rush of the day from cutting people off at the exit ramp. PGP.

“I hear there are hot guys on the 9th floor.” PGP.

Someone asking “What did you get?” every single time you come back from lunch. PGP.

Office pregnancy announcement via mass email. PGP.

Sneezed at the urinal, pissed on my tie. PGP.