Taking a sick day when you aren’t sick to avoid your office full of coworkers who refuse to take a sick day when they are. PGP.

Accidentally put salt instead of sugar in my coffee this morning. PGP.

Client joined the meeting 24 hours early and emailed everyone asking why no one is on the line yet. PGP.

Client provided us with only half the data we need, and after explaining this to him, still expects a full analysis. PGP.

Birthday greetings from your credit card company reminding you your bill is due. PGP.

“Please apply through our online portal.” Also known as the place where resumes go to die. PGP.

Took Monday – Thursday off. Still had 5 ass chewings today. PGP.

Not today Sallie Mae. PGP.

My life is a typo. PGP.

My job is 100% fixing other people fucking up. PGP.