Dual monitors to “increase employee productivity”… Except during March Madness. PGP.

Wifi access for employees and access to Pandora and Spotify was blocked overnight.

Rearranging my apps was the most productive thing I’ve done all day.

In order to get promoted at my office you have to accept a pay cut for 2 years.

“It has come to our attention…” PGP.

“Hey, you done your taxes yet?”

I swear at my laptop. PGP

I had a 7:45 meeting scheduled for this morning. Client canceled at 7:38. PGP

Googling symptoms of the Zakia virus while hungover at work. PGP

The guy who works next to me constantly thinks out loud. PGP.

I’ll never be the first to down vote, but I’ll certainly help pile on. PGP.

When you start discussing your favorite actors in the company’s video training series with the other new hires. PGP.