Having troubling determining whats been longer, my dry streak or unemployment. PGP.

The guy who doesn’t even pretend to care about making eye contact in the hallway. PGP.

Putting way too much thought into categorizing your phone apps while on the toilet. PGP.

Fantasizing more about sleep than sex. PGP.

Got bored today at work. Tried to see if a paperclip would fit through my earring hole in my ear lobe. PGP.

I’m six weeks late…to get my oil changed. PGP.

I’m seriously considering moving in with a girl I’m not that interested in just so I can save 50% on rent. PGP.

According to my calculations, it will at least two years until I can afford 2-ply toilet paper. PGP.

Hearing friends’ salaries and knowing I picked the wrong major. PGP.

The only place I get air conditioning during the day is on public transportation. PGP.