We meet again, motion sensor restroom light switches. PGP.

The insanely difficult 5:30 decision between hitting the gym or bottle. PGP.

Getting excited over gas prices. PGP.

Don’t threaten me with a good time. Really, don’t. My bank account can’t handle it. PGP.

Is there a way to exchange my lunch hour for a nap hour? PGP.

The influx of PGPs that are posted during lunch breaks and right before office closing time. PGP.

Boss finally invited me to sit in his box at a Cards game. It’s preseason. Against the Texans. PGP.

Hungover at work. On a Tuesday. PGP.

Packing a lip, then immediately chasing it with whitening gum. PGP.

My career arc is disturbingly similar to Matt Leinart’s. PGP.