Mark Cuban is my spirit animal. PGP.

Asking Santa for a better job. PGP.

The Monday after the open-bar company Christmas party. PGP.

I went first in white elephant. PGP.

My bank account sits at -$13.47. I am worth negative one medium, no topping pizza. PGP.

Everyone in my company uses stand up desks. PGP.

I just changed my Netflix password and got angry texts from three of my exes. HBO Go is next. PGPM.

Wanting socks for Christmas. PGP.

Everything in my cube shakes when my coworkers walk by. PGP.

Leftovers have already gone bad. PGP.