My parents bought a bar. They still charge me for drinks. PGP.

The overly aggressive automatic flusher just sprayed shit all over my clothes. PGP.

Boss had me chauffeur him to a job site to avoid parking. Got an hour long nap out of the deal. PGP.

I call our outsourced team in India more than I call my mother. PGP.

Got bored today at work. Tried to see if a paperclip would fit through my earring hole in my ear lobe. PGP.

Considering Kirkland Signature as a viable clothing option. PGP.

I’m six weeks late…to get my oil changed. PGP.

Too young to know better. Old enough to have to give a damn. PGP.

Celebrating with a new pair of shoes after a successful week of dieting. Now I can’t afford groceries next week, and the cycle continues.

I’m seriously considering moving in with a girl I’m not that interested in just so I can save 50% on rent. PGP.