Everything in my cube shakes when my coworkers walk by. PGP.

One of these days, I’m going to scream “Shut the fuck up” out loud instead of in my head. PGP.

I quoted “Varsity Blues” in a meeting. No one had any idea what the fuck I was talking about. PGP.

“If you gave a fuck about your job as much as you do football…” -My Boss. PGP.

I bet the Chive’s HR Department is a nightmare. PGP.

The printer at work was making a painfully high pitched noise, and I was the only one young enough to hear it. PGP.

Getting up to go to the bathroom out of boredom, not necessity. PGP.

Teaching people who make five times my salary how to do their jobs correctly. PGP.

I still get confused over which direction to go out of the elevator. PGP.

Bought a new mattress and a new office chair. If that’s how I’m going to spend 90% of my time, I might as well be comfortable. PGP.