Waiting to get a haircut until your next paycheck. PGP.

My boss types with two fingers. PGP.

The only thing I pre-game is bed. PGP.

Getting way too worked up when people don’t reciprocate the thank you wave in traffic. PGP.

Untucking your shirt on casual Friday so your gut doesn’t look as bad. PGP.

Spending money on a Candy Crush level and still not beating it. PGP.

Please go to voicemail. PGP.

At this point I’m literally just pissing coffee. PGP.

Calling your own office phone from your cell phone underneath the desk so a coworker will stop talking to you. PGP.

Looking up healthy recipes, printing them out and then eating fast food instead. PGP.