Mumbling “fuck you” under your breath to everyone that emails you asking for “an update”. PGP.

My Bank of America account has three figures. PGP.

My boss has called me every “J” name in the world except for my actual name. PGP.

All the bathrooms in my building block phone and wifi signal. PGP.

My life is now just looking forward to the next time I get drunk and hate myself for it. PGP.

1. “Morning!”. 2. “Yes, it is.” PGP.

My boss laughed at me for volunteering. PGP.

Got bored today at work. Tried to see if a paperclip would fit through my earring hole in my ear lobe. PGP.

Your most positive thought of the day being, “Maybe today won’t suck that bad.” PGP.