For my 25th birthday I got laid off. PGP.

“We’re just not seeing the productivity we’d like.” PGP.

Finally getting the automated rejection email for a job you applied for 18 months ago. PGP.

Being way too proud of your airline and hotel rewards status. PGP.

The insanely difficult 5:30 decision between hitting the gym or bottle. PGP.

Don’t threaten me with a good time. Really, don’t. My bank account can’t handle it. PGP.

Having to choose between 20 minutes more sleep or rubbing one out before work. PGP.

Having the company card on work travel, but opting to stay in for a good night’s rest. PGP.

I have way too much in common with Peter Gibbons for only being 23. PGP.