Passing off a hangover as horrible allergies.

Priced out a minivan today. PGP

Contemplated calling in a noise complaint on my undergrad neighbors around 11:45pm last night. PGP

Lying about having seen a YouTube video so you don’t have to stand there and watch it.

James Bond knows what the weight of an empty gun feels like. I’m the same way with my stapler. PGP.

Acromyms.PGP.

Just cracked open a tall boy…..of Arizona Iced Tea. PGP.

Saw an old college hookup on a reality show on Bravo. PGP

Gave in my two weeks. People keep saying “We will miss you”. How am I supposed to respond to that? PGP.

One day I am going to tie my tie right the first time #PGP