ALL CAPS IS INDUSTRY STANDARD. i FORGET TO TURN IT OFF OCCASIONALLY AND EVERYONE THINKS I’M YELLING ON FACEBOOK. PGP.

There was a fight today in the office. I was at lunch. PGP.

Legitimately concerned about the extra hour of drinking coming up due to Daylight Savings Time. PGP.

Thinking about getting married. PGP.

Getting a girlfriend was the best decision socially and worst decision financially. PGP.

Empathizing with Gandhi when you have to wait until 12:45 for lunch. PGP.

There’s always trade school. PGP.

Legitimately asking cashiers “How’s your day going?” not out of politeness, but because I’m so eager to interact with anybody outside of my office. PGP.

Tried to haze the pledges at homecoming. Corporate life has made me soft. PGP.