Found out at homecoming I can still drink like I did in college. The hangover lasted till Wednesday. PGP.

HR guy at my new job told me to go out and celebrate with drinks with close family and friends. Got Jimmy John’s alone. PGP.

I’ve been showing up early for work for two months because I was in line for a promotion. Company outsourced the hire. I now have three conference calls a week with someone named Samar. PGP.

Trying to get into your car with your access badge after work. PGP.

Drake’s perspective of not having any new friends is a lot different from mine. PGP.

My little brother just graduated law school in the top five percent of his class. My dog got kicked out of obedience school. PGP.

My boss said “We’re done beating around the bush” today and instead of laughing, I just thought about how little sex I’m having. PGP.

Homecoming is this Saturday. I need to get approximately 11 hours of sleep a night this week. PGP.

Saying you’re in your “mid-20s” at 27. PGP.