I test my desk at least once a day to see if I could actually flip it when I eventually rage quit this job. PGP.

I don’t know what it’s like to be fat, but I’m awfully close to finding out. PGP.

Instinctively following your name with what company you are with on the phone, even during personal calls. PGP.

If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit. PGP.

Just told a joke to the guy in the cube next to me. He wasn’t there. PGP.

I have a case of the Tuesdays? PGP.

Lying that you’re younger to girls at the bar, and lying that you’re older at client meetings. PGP.

The only reason I want to keep this job is because it gives me ideas for PGP posts. PGP.

I want my friends to know that my PGP account is me, but I don’t want my employers to know. PGP.

Getting in trouble for not taking a lunch break. PGP.