Discovering not all office toilets are created equally

I have a case of the Mondays.

Being unofficially forced to throw in money for my boss’s going away gift. He’s only been my boss for 3 months. PGP.

Telling myself “I’m only going to work here like a year tops”. That was 3 years ago. PGP

Sending out the desperate “Anything going on tonight?” mass text. PGP.

Framed my degree, but there’s really no place to hang it in this cubicle. PGP.

Just came to the realization that I am now older than 99.9% of college athletes. PGP.

The whole office spent the first hour and a half of work today debating that damn dress.

I used the phrase “circle the wagons” today and I hate myself for it. PGP.

Went to apologize to my boss for being late. He had no idea who I was. #PGP