I’m starting to order more water than beer at the bar. PGP.

Office’s computer network was hacked so all systems are down. I’ve being doing newspaper puzzles all morning and getting paid for it. PGP.

My job frequently touts “Work/Life Balance” but regularly denies PTO… PGP.

That one neighbor who doesn’t shovel his portion of the sidewalk…oh wait that was me. PGP.

Got food poisoning on the second day of my honeymoon. PGP.

Feeling proud for stopping at three beers. PGP.

My 11-year-old cousin gets more Instagram likes than I do. PGP.

When my boss asked me about my New Year’s Resolution, I almost said “finding a new job.” PGP.

My mom still feels the need to make certain situations into life lessons. I am 26. PGP.

Just bought an ice scraper for my car. I live in Florida. PGP.