Realizing that “TY” or “Thx” is the closest thing you’ll ever get to a sincere “Thank you” from your boss. PGP.

One of the partners brought me along with him to a college basketball game, so as a thanks I bought him a beer. He didn’t want it. PGP.

Monday’s are for lighting fires you’ll have to put out by Friday. PGP.

Client provided us with only half the data we need, and after explaining this to him, still expects a full analysis. PGP.

Volunteered to take minutes one time… now I’m known as Minute Man. PGP.

My humble brags are now mostly humbling. PGP.

Birthday greetings from your credit card company reminding you your bill is due. PGP.

“Please apply through our online portal.” Also known as the place where resumes go to die. PGP.

The overly talkative coworker that asks, “Why do you wear headphones?” PGP.

Took Monday – Thursday off. Still had 5 ass chewings today. PGP.