Constantly minimizing the ESPN tab when you hear footsteps. PGP.

I wonder what millionaires would think if they knew that the people managing their money can’t remember to flush the toilet. PGP.

The Facebook memories feature has been nothing but photos from freshman year for the last 2 weeks. PGP.

My lunch buddy cheated on me today with someone down the hall. PGP.

I used the phrase “circle the wagons” today and I hate myself for it. PGP.

Taking two days of PTO meaning you do a week’s work in three days. PGP.

Watering down your humor to make it office appropriate. PGP.

I always pull out….of the driveway by 7:15. PGP

Still can’t grow a beard. PGP

Target taste, Walmart budget. PGP