Instinctively opening a new browser tab each time you hear someone walking your way. PGP.

Changing girls as often as your underwear. TFM. Changing girls as often as your oil. PGP.

1: “It could definitely use another set of eyes.” 2: “I have poor vision.” PGP.

Slowly deleting your social media accounts due to their triviality. PGP.

I spent a total of about 53 seconds outside today. PGP.

Graduate Saturday, start work Monday. PGP.

John Taffer couldn’t rescue my department. PGP.

Monday morning me really hates weekend me. Fuck that guy. PGP.