Left the office 15 minutes before I turned 23. PGP.

Dismissed for “lack of ambition” after personally choosing 9.5 hour days at the office. PGP.

I was the only one left in the office at 5:00, and the janitor came by my desk and informed me, “You know, you’re not getting any extra credit for staying late.” PGP.

Chugging coffee so I can take as many bathroom breaks as possible during all day training with our auditors. PGP.

Having to write the “I’m pretty sure I just really fucked up” email to your boss. PGP.

“So what are you giving up for Lent?” PGP.

Replying all to ask people not to reply all. Oh, the irony. PGP.

My work wife was laid off this morning for “reasons purely financial.” PGP.

Calling in sick for Monday during brunch on Sunday. PGP.

Getting my cubicle downgraded to a trading desk layout. PGP.