My Mom hasn’t done my laundry since I was in 7th grade.

No one has emailed me since noon. Am I dead?

When I don’t wear make-up to work, “Someone looks tired today!” PGP.

“I just wanted to give you a quick update…”

I just realized that my job makes me go through the 5 stages of grief…every single day. PGP

“Is it me guys, or does it feel like it should be Friday?” PGP.

Deleting all browsing history, every day. PGPM.

My division director sent out an email saying there would be no bonuses this year, followed by another email with pictures of his new corvette…..which is parked in his driveway next to his other four corvettes. PGP.

My quarterly performance review is coming up. I hope I get fired. PGP

My day doesn’t really begin until coffee and I destroy a toilet. PGP