My brown bag lunch is now a tall boy to get me through the second half of the day. PGP.

Slowly but surely gaining weight. PGP.

Started at the bottom, I’m still here. PGP.

My boss made me do pushups for screwing up. PGP.

Having nightmares about work-related disasters. PGP.

Tailgating with a 10am coffee instead of a 10am beer. PGP.

Taking initiative and then fucking up whatever it was you were trying to accomplish. PGP.

Being in at least four fantasy football leagues because that is all you have to look forward to. PGP.

Not knowing the newest drug slang. PGP.

Turning around when you hear too many people in the break room, just to avoid being social. PGP.

Ordering takeout right after buying groceries. PGP.

That special place in hell for whoever takes the last of the coffee and doesn’t make a new pot. PGP.