When making it rain means you’re watering your wife’s flowers. PGP.

Being a house with no lights on for Halloween. PGP.

I didn’t fart! That was just me adjusting in the leather chair! PGP.

Binge thinking. PGP.

My brown bag lunch is now a tall boy to get me through the second half of the day. PGP.

When a homeless guy asks if you can spare a dollar and the answer really is no. PGP.

When someone mentions SEC football and you think of the Securities and Exchange Commission. PGP.

Working past happy hour. PGP.

Going HAM tonight. Probably with cheese on wheat. PGP.

Actually having to “drink responsibly.” PGP.