Failed attempts at morning sex before work. PGP.

Was at the office so long, I arrived healthy and left with a cold. PGP.

Already bit into a donut filled with mayonnaise and had a prank call this morning. PGP.

Girl next to me sits there listening to music and snap chatting yet still gets paid more than me. PGP

Put in my two weeks and I’ve never been more bored. PGP

It kind of looks like the hot girl in the office got a boob job, but I can’t tell and there’s no one here I can confer with. PGP

“Why don’t you take a stab at this one?” PGP.

My boss sneeze-sharted during my performance review today. PGP.

I cut my own hair. PGP.

I have perfected the art of “looking busy.” PGP.

My colleague just excitedly told me she has exactly 16 days and 2.25 hours left at this company. PGP.

I seriously had a can of tuna for dinner and was okay with it.