Waking up late and getting to work on time means I just found my new wake up time. PGP.

There are now NFL head coaches younger than me. PGP.

Violently sneezed at the urinal and pissed all over myself. PGP.

Toeing the line between skinny fat and just fat. PGP.

Saw my sister on Tinder. PGP.

Burned my bagel this morning. PGP.

Holiday party is a cash bar. I can’t wait to leave this place. PGP.

Went to a bar to watch the fight. Couldn’t make it to the main event. PGP.

Only veteran in my department, only one in my department at work today. PGP.