Just got my first raise at work in almost 2 years. I’m still laughably underpaid. PGP.

“If it’s not in Salesforce, it didn’t happen.” PGP.

Your relationship eerily mirroring that of Todd and Girl’s. PGP.

“Maybe I should tell my parents that I need the house for an hour” being thought right before my first hook up since moving back in after graduation. PGP.

Flirting with the HR girl has to be a trap. PGP.

My company is “encouraging” us to join the Workplace by Facebook and share our lives at work. PGP.

Pretty sure I threw out my back yesterday by sitting in my car driving. PGP.

I usually keep an extra shirt in my office for emergencies. Took it home yesterday and spilled coffee on myself today. PGP.

“You don’t look like the marrying type.” PGP.

In a wedding but just as an usher. PGP.