No one in my office cares about the Derby. I live and work in Kentucky. PGP.

Getting your entire office of millennials hooked on PGP. PGP.

A group of recent college graduates asked me if I’m “also” considered a Millennial. I’m only 25. PGP.

I’m the asshole who brews a new pot of coffee every time I need a pot of coffee. Every. Time. PGP.

Finding out that college was basically an $80,000 Excel workshop. PGP.

My boss’s opening line in my preformance review was, “Do you even like this job?” Crap. PGP.

Facebook suggesting I add my 50-year-old coworkers as friends. PGP.

Being in a constant state of “just gotta get to the weekend.” PGP.

There’s no such thing as a free lunch, especially if it means you’re forced to soberly interact with coworkers. PGP.

A girl at a bar told me that “accounting is sooo boring.” And walked away from me after she asked what I do for a living. PGP.