Can we all just agree that the international sign for “Leave me alone” is eating lunch at your desk? PGP.

Dreaming about retirement three years into the workforce. PGP.

I have managed my company’s NFL tickets for three years. I am yet to go to a game. PGP.

My coworker just got engaged to someone she met on Tinder two months ago. PGP.

Shamelessly “nice work”ing all my comments. PGP.

Skipping happy hour to take your dog to the park. PGP.

Gameday weddings. PGP.

Not going to grad school because I just spent 17 fucking years in school. PGP.

The combined record of my college team, my pro team, and my two fantasy football teams: 1-12. PGP.

Getting so bored at work that you actually do work. PGP.