Getting a good night’s sleep, but still depending on coffee to get through the day. PGP.

Brought in donuts on my first Friday in the new office. Upside: everyone likes me. Downside: now I have no beer money for the weekend. PGP.

Getting more excited about Tax Breaks than Spring Breaks. PGP.

Just went to HEB solely for ketchup and wine. PGP.

Jealous of Obama because he gets to quit his job today. PGP.

There are now NFL head coaches younger than me. PGP.

Violently sneezed at the urinal and pissed all over myself. PGP.

One of my work friends got engaged today meanwhile I fucked my ex. PGP.

Fuck it. I’m getting wine tonight. PGP.

Parents and in-laws both going apeshit about which family events we attend and for how long during the holidays. Let’s call the whole thing off. PGP.