Lying about having seen a YouTube video so you don’t have to stand there and watch it.

Listening to stories about people’s kids. PGP

I’ve never been asked for proof that I graduated. PGP.

1: “How bout that rain last night?” 2: “Yeah, we need it, though.” PGP.

I don’t think anyone in my office would notice if I went missing.

More like DRINK DE MAYO. AMIRIGHT?! (Just kidding, I’m at work and went to bed at 9:30 last night.) PGP