My coworker responded “Thank you, master” in a group text with my boss. I’m not sure if I can take this anymore. PGP.

That knowing “you’re gonna go get fucked up, aren’t you?” look from your boss when you tell him you’re taking PTO to go to Vegas. PGP.

We just got a 4 slot toaster in the office and I’m ecstatic. PGP.

Got Chinese food and my fortune cookie didn’t have a fortune inside. PGP.

Just bragged to someone about my Credit score. PGP.

Someone took a dump on the office bathroom floor today and then stepped in it. PGP.

When your boss forwards you a boring 1 hour meeting and demands you attend for him because he “doesn’t want to.” PGP.

Took a half day to relax. Got bored and logged on to work remotely. PGP.

New at the company and didn’t know the lock on the end bathroom stall was “faulty.” Someone walked in on me taking a shit. There was eye contact. PGP.

“If I had worked this hard in college I would have gotten a 4.0.” PGP.