Coming in for a full day with nothing to do but attend a meeting scheduled for the last hour. PGP.

Everytime I hear the printer firing up outside my office, I know that’s my cue to make it appear as if I’m working. PGP.

Well today has turned into a run out the clock situation…..again

Pissing as loud as possible to let everyone in the bathroom know you probably have a big dick. PGPM

Got caught picking my nose by a quiet-footed coworker walking by my office. PGP

You’re either the slacker who called in sick or the jerk who got the office sick. PGP

Being thankful, not offended, when not asked to be in the wedding party. PGP

Dude in the stall beside me was shamelessly blaring gangster rap from his phone. PGPM for him. PGP for me.

I wonder what millionaires would think if they knew that the people managing their money can’t remember to flush the toilet. PGP.

Someone’s car alarm in the parking lot has been going off for hours.