While I really appreciate it, giving me my own office with a door was a big mistake as far as productivity goes. PGP.

The guy next to me quit so I switched my monitor for his bigger one. PGPM.

Holy shit my timeline is nauseating. PGP.

I don’t go to happy hour with my coworkers for fear of getting drunk and telling them how much I hate them

Get me the fuck out of here. PGP.

I’m not even pretending to work today. PGP.

This post is the most productive thing I’ve done all day. PGP

Mustered up the courage to ask for a half day today. No one else even showed up.

The hardest part of my job is pretending to care.

“at least it was good interview practice”. PGP.