I did absolutely nothing this weekend. PGP.

Getting upset if you poop before you get to work. PGP.

A grocery store gift card for your Christmas bonus. PGP.

Just got an email saying we’re on track for record profits for the fourth quarter in a row. It was followed up with an email explaining why we’re not getting a Christmas bonus. PGP.

Still haven’t bought Christmas presents for my family. PGP.

Making more money than I ever have in my life, still managing to be broke as fuck. PGP.

The guy in the cube next to me is going through a techno phase. PGP.

Hangover toilet nap violently interrupted by someone else’s diarrhea. PGP.

Got a “buy one, get one” coupon for Chipotle in the mail yesterday. Date night is covered. PGP.