Sounds like my upstairs neighbor just purchased an electric guitar, and doesn’t know how to play it. PGP.

It’s my last day at work. I’m showing up two hours late just to clean out my desk and wave goodbye.

Not being able to connect to the company WiFi in the bathroom. PGP.

Took vacation on my birthday next week to avoid my coworkers, they found out and are making me celebrate today. PGP.

“Is it on Netflix?”

Forgetting your headphones is like the end of the world. PGP.

All my college friends are still single and booze hounds. I’m married and get drunk of with a 6 pack. PGP

Office summer party is tomorrow. I don’t think I can take an extra 3+ hours of pretending to like these people. PGP.

Paying rent before your friend’s bachelor party because you don’t trust yourself. PGP.

Opened up a Roth IRA today. Childhood officially dead.