Brushing your teeth while peeing in the morning to save time. PGP.

That moment of anxiety between logging into your bank account and waiting for the page to load. PGP.

Getting caught staring out the window, looking like a “puppy that can’t wait to get outside.” PGP.

Waiting 5 minutes after your boss leaves early, then leaving early. PGP.

I swear every single person in my office sneezes like a fucking freak. PGP.

“Risky Business” Halloween costume doubling as Skype interview attire. PGP.

Facebook is where I go to remind myself that college was worth it. PGP.

“I’m thinking about getting my real estate license.” PGP.

If I’m leaving work at the same time as a coworker, I’ll dip into the bathroom so I don’t have to talk to them the whole way out. PGP.

“401k” used to be where all the parties went down in our dorm. PGP.