Already being asked if I’ve been naughty or nice this year. PGP.

The bare minimum I do is starting to exceed expectations. PGP.

I did No-Shave November and no one noticed. PGP.

Having to scroll down to find your birth year when registering for stuff online. PGP.

Now that it’s sweater weather, I can wear my stained dress shirts again. PGP.

Getting excited when receiving a Target gift card because it’s a sensible and practical gift. PGP.

I just changed my Netflix password and got angry texts from three of my exes. HBO Go is next. PGPM.

Wanting socks for Christmas. PGP.

Everything in my cube shakes when my coworkers walk by. PGP.

Happy wife means fuck my life. PGP.