Your doctor reminding you that not every pizza is a personal pizza. PGP.

I’m writing the code for the program that will automate my job. What is job security?

Hoping my bank account balance is an April Fool’s joke. PGP

Too old to act like a kid, too young to get treated like an adult. PGP.

I flirted with a 48-year-old divorcee today. PGP.

Referencing an assistant that you don’t have to people outside of your office. PGP.

Dreading your coworkers’ attempts at April Fools

Friends with benefits now means my friends have health insurance and a 401k. #PGP

Actually having to clean your place before having a girl over. PGP

Calling in sick on opening day after giving your 2 weeks.