I need coffee to poop in the morning now PGP

Passed out on my couch Friday night … My backs still sore. PGP

That’s what I love about these interns, man. I get older, they stay the same age. PGP.

HR still uses internet explorer. #PGP

Fitbit giving me weekly reminders of how lazy I am. PGP.

The 48 hour grace period you get before your “alma mater” calls looking for donations…. PGP

Fat, but not happy.

I know exactly how much I can drink on a weeknight and not be hungover at work the next day. I usually blow right past it around 9 p.m. PGP.

You make a drunken scene at one family wedding, and no one lets you live it down. PGP