Just followed PGP on my company’s Twitter account. Almost got fired. PGP.

Everyone at the company baseball game bought beer. I bought Dippin Dots. PGP.

The VP of my department has a mullet. PGP.

My boss is letting everyone hang out in the conference room and watch the World Cup. I hate soccer. PGP.

Spelling your email phonetically. PGP.

I missed my train on purpose this morning so I could just have a few more minutes to myself. PGP.

90% of the emails I send start with “Sorry for the delay.” PGP.