My coworker told me today that I was “speedy for a millennial.”

Fire alarm went off seconds after settling into my favorite stall.

The exhilarating rush of deleting multiple rows at once on an Excel spreadsheet.

“Are you going to go too hard at the holiday party again this year?”

Saving PTO between Christmas and New Years by “working from home” when you know nobody will be in the office.

My credit score going up 20 points was the most exciting moment of my week.

Having Alexa set recurring 14-minute reminders to touch the keyboard to keep an ‘Active’ status in Skype Business while working from home.

The three-day week of Thanksgiving introducing more stress in your life than your average five-day work week.

Moving your booze from the top of the fridge to an expensive cart so it instantly becomes decorative.

Received a rejection email for a job I never applied for.