Told my secretary I wasn’t feeling well and was going to check out early. She said “you don’t look very good.” I’m actually fine, I just wanted to run some errands.

Matched with my insurance adjuster on Tinder.

“A few questions regarding your expense report.”

“You catch that action item?”

Waiting that extra minute in the stall so you don’t have to have an awkward washing your hands conversation with a coworker.

Happy hour ends at 7:00. Office hours don’t.

Even though my boss never talks to me, getting that email that he will be out of the office for the rest of the week really calms the nerves.

“We want this call to be conversational in nature.”