I don’t know which is worse, a cold private toilet seat or a warm public one. PGP.

Broke my ankle over MDW. Getting all kinds of shade thrown my way at the office. PGP.

I purposely mess up my travel receipt envelopes just so the cute girl in accounting will email me. PGP.

The last three birthday parties I’ve been invited to have been for 1-year-olds. PGP.

Giving up on an entire week because your mouse ran out of batteries. PGP.

I’ve got a case of the Tuesdays. PGP.

Thinking of getting back together with my ex for the Netflix password. PGP.

“I keep forgetting it’s not Monday!” -Everyone. PGP.

Getting argumentative in internet comment sections because how else are you meant to pass the time? PGP.

The coworker who reads the news to the office every morning. PGP.

Manager in email: “Team, please send me your projected PTO [paid time off] dates for the period of 1 June through 26 Sep 2014 by COB today.” PGP.

Welcome to the junior high of life. PGP.