Practicing my golf swing mid-conversation.

Dropping $170 on a first date only to get dumped after the second date.

My mom just endorsed me on LinkedIn.

Had to go buy a Pedialyte and Advil on my lunchbreak. Ran into my boss in the checkout line.

First day back after vacation and I’ve already been told I look dead inside.

Burned through the weekly sixer by Tuesday afternoon.

My computer screen is visible to the majority of the office.

Was asked what I thought my weaknesses were in my review then was told what my actual weaknesses were.

My ex is stalking me on Linkedin.

Deciding against another cup of coffee because you don’t want to refill the Keurig.

Discovered that Kombucha is carbonated. At my desk. All over my keyboard.

Turned in my two weeks today. I don’t think anyone cares.