My college jeans don’t fit anymore. PGP.

The most daring thing I’ve done this week was like an Instagram pic by a girl three points out of my league. PGP.

Just found out that I have to move cubes. Might just quit instead. PGP.

Prop bets on which friend’s baby will cry first at the Super Bowl party, and whose pregnant wife will make him leave first. PGP.

Finally have three years of work under my belt, so I can now apply for other entry level jobs that required 3-5 years of experience. PGP.

My condoms expired. PGP.

It was a tough decision, but I am now moving my official bed time from 11 to 10. PGP.

Saying you’re in your “mid-20s” at 27. PGP.

1: “How’d you meet your wife?” 2: “Tinder.” PGP.

I had a long argument with my girlfriend over a spam email from eHarmony last night. PGP.