“Late night, come home. Work sucks, I know.” PGP.

Leaving the last bit of your lunch unfinished and in front of you so when coworkers come over to talk they think they’re interrupting. PGP.

Stealing a Tabasco from Chipotle is the biggest rush I’ve gotten in 2014. PGP.

Still taking Adderall whenever you need to be productive. PGP.

If I found out an asteroid was going to hit earth today, I wouldn’t be all that upset. PGP.

I see how many times I can say “meow” on my daily conference call without anyone noticing. My record is 3. PGP.

Actually having to check the expiration date on condoms before using them. PGP.