Actually having to clean your place before having a girl over. PGP

Oil change, haircut, or Chipotle. Pick two. PGP.

Having your dreams of a billion dollar bracket crushed before noon. PGP.

Strategically hydrating all day for your four beers at happy hour and still waking up the next day with a pounding ache. PGP

My high school sweetheart is already beginning to bald.